Bigfoot Spotted on Grand Cayman Island - - Experts Shocked!
A sullen sub-tropical Sasquatch has been spotted mingling with oblivious tourists in George Town, Grand Cayman Island. Panic was avoided as tourists and locals thought the beast was part of a performing street artiste group. It was only when the animal upended a trash bin looking for stale sushi did people suspect this was no show.Flummoxed local police authorities have been unable to capture the crafty creature. "Not much happens here on Grand Cayman in terms of your average criminal behavior", said an obsessed government spokesman, "Oh sure we get Yanks driving on the wrong side of the street. We get golf balls hitting luxury condominium windows.... and we get a lot of laundry business in our banks. We're proud of our financial industry... these banks have huge washing machines in the basement. They'll even offer free dry cleaning while you wait. Dollars, Pounds, Euros, Bolivares... it's all legit, I can assure you!"
 |
| Grand Cayman Sasquatch Sniffing for Stale Sushi. |
 |
| Beastie Bigfoot Spotted on South Church Street. |
"Look, I was there when the bigfoot fiasco happened on Grand Cayman. This beast poses a real threat to global sushi shipping and the crazy cruise ship industry", said Erk Holohead, a member of the bored of directors of the SETI NOT YETI Institute in tropical Yuba City, California. "Those Bigfoots are mostly idiots. They have a brain the size of a walnut. If you can't expect a typical cruise ship tourist to get on the right shuttle craft back to their ship, how do you expect an Ape Man to do the same? They can't read! That Bigfoot could be anywhere in the world right now, terrorizing port after port. Imagine if it stowed away on a submarine? Egads."
