Saturday, June 8, 2024

A NEW BIGFOOT SIGHTING IN SHOCKED SINGAPORE!

SINGAPORE SLAPPED SILLY AGAIN WITH SASQUATCH SORTIE!

The usually well contained island nation of Singapore was rudely subjected to a new Bigfoot sighting, causing rare disorder in this most orderly of nations. 

Infiltrating Bigfoot Versus Pink Orchid Singapore Bambi. 

"I say, we were visiting a most exciting Orchid Garden Park in Singapore when IT happened.", said a shocked tourist. "We really like the paintings showing flowers and animals in colors not found in nature, except for at Chernobyl. Suddenly, this vile smelly animal appeared in the park and made a foul stench! At first I thought it was my mother-in-law, but to my horror it was a gigantic hairy ape-man! The beast appeared to be interested in junk food thrown into the local dustbins. It tried to eat an orchid but spit it out... too vegan for him I think?" 

Bigfoot spotted at Changi Airport! Did it actually board a transpacific flight?

The same day, a local Singaporean about to board a gambler's direct flight to luxurious Las Vegas was astounded to see the same ape-man lounging around Changi Airport. "I was amazed! I immediately called my bookie check on the odds of a Sasquatch ever venturing into Changi, it is around One Trillion to one against! I took that bet for the future... it's a sure thing. I didn't spot him on the flight... wherever he went it wasn't Vegas."

Dr. Karl Blinng, Director-for-Life of the Luxurious YETI not SETI Institute, was skeptical of this recent Bigfoot sighting. "In my years of intense study into Sasquatch behavior, DNA, bodily fluids, and mating habits, I've never encountered a Bigfoot eating orchids. But consider... if the hairy 8 foot tall beast ever made to The Strip in Las Vegas I bet no one would notice him in the crowds. They've seen 'em all. He'd just blend in. And if he had $100 on him they'd let him try out their slot machines!"