In a shocking development for the out-to-sea tourism industry, the real reason a cruise ship recently turned back to port was NOT a massive case of odoriferous passenger gastro-intestinal problems. Nor was the cancellation due to a lack of alcohol and clever towel sculptures on board. No!
We know the real reason. It's almost too shocking to tell the public. In fact, the truth would be irresponsible to share. This news can cause widespread panic!
OK, here's what happened:
A sneaky Sasquatch slipped on board a docked cruise ship in Texas, searching for random leftover chicken wings and flat beer. These ignorant beasts don't understand departure times, and this poor animal was trapped on board when the ship pulled away from port.
|SOS! Sasquatch On Ship!|
|Bigfoot - Master and Commander of Grand Cayman Harbor.|
|Concerned Cruise Ship Passengers attend Emergency Bigfoot Meeting. Free champagne for all.|
|The famous masterpiece "Doggie Stairway to Heaven" on display in the art gallery was miraculously saved from malicious Sasquatch damage.|