BigFoot Romps Through California State Capitol!

Sasquatch Meets Governator. State Police Not Amused....

Easily entertained but shell-shocked tourists claimed a 'sour smelling' Sasquatch ran past the Capitol security checkpoint but then stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the Caulyfornia Governator, Aunold Alios Schwarzenegger in a video just inside the building... 
"The monkey-beast was mesmerized, like a kid watching TV.", said an ice cube lobbyist. "The ape-man thought Aunould was inside the flat-screen... he  jumped up and down yelling 'koooan! koooan!', then he ran down the hall chased by a wild-eyed state trooper. Man, you should have seen the fleas on that guy.... and on the Sasquatch too!"

Caught by state security camera... the BigFoot intruder runs past the Governator's office. "He looked scared silly" said a silly state assemblyman, who should know what silly is.

 

Sasquatch runs away: Chased by Capitol security, BigFoot bolted outside in panic through a 'No Exit' side-door, setting off exit alarms and triggering a massive ape-man hunt on the Capitol grounds..... "That fur-bag saw a large bear in front of Arnie's office and thought it was going to eat him. He flipped-out... I mean he lost it. He screamed like a little girl and ran away. What a wus!"

Sasquatch evades capture attempt! Escaping the Capitol building, the wiley BigFoot evaded a state police dragnet on the Capitol grounds and ran off in the direction of the Caulifornya Leek of Citiez. No permanent damage was done by the blundering Bigfoot,  but several indoor air quality monitors 'went off the charts' during the ape-man invasion. Experts say it will take weeks to fumigate the building.

Why did a wild BigFoot barge into the California State Capitol in Sacramento? Experts are clueless, again. "BigFoots hold Governator Aunold in high regard and treat him as a cult hero. We saw this fenonermone... phenomecon... ahhh... this stuff happen last year in Livermore" said the BigFoot Investigations Agency in Fresno, California. "These beasts think "Conan The Barbarian" is a documentary. Sasquatches can't read or write, but they know fine cinema when they see it. Word on the street is that they like "Predator" too. They don't like romantic comedies."

BigFoot CAUGHT ON CAMERA: SASQUATCH LIKES SUDS!

Elusive BigFoot Captured on Remote Candid Camera -- Beer used as BigFoot Bait!

A group of renown BigFoot hunters from Texas, California and upper Macedonia claim Sasquatch exists and likes fermented hops. Using a remote deer-hunter video camera equipped with a motion detector, the team placed an irresistible bottle of BigFoot Ale in the camera's range and returned to the site a week later to retrieve the video. The location is tippy top secret. The Sasquatch results were astonishing:

Sasquatch Bait: Big Foot Ale Sasquatch Trap: The BigFoot hunter team placed this bottle of Sierra Nevada BigFoot Ale in a location likely to attract wandering Bigfoots. "We spent long hours in carefully selected bars to determine which beer to use. It took hard work, dedication, dart games and a lot of scientific sampling to figure out which brew was the best Sasquatch bait.", said Texas BigFoot hunter Briian Leerky, famous Rice University expert on Sasquatchology.

BigFoot caught on Camera with Big Foot Ale Bait CAUGHT ON FILM! A random wandering Sasquatch became attracted to the bait - - he peered into the remote control video camera... and sniffed the camera housing before biting it.

Drunk BigFoot after drinking 9.5% Big Foot AleLightweight Sasquatch: Bombed Bigfoot waves woozily to the camera after downing the BigFoot Ale bait in one gulp and eating the bottle. "He not hav no stamina for gud Ales!" said legendary Sasquatch hunter Aleksandar Poopov, "I vud hav tout he cud handled it, no?. Vat a wus!"

Dr. Karl Blinng of the YETI not SETI Institute was eerily estatic. "Beer! That is the missing link to the missing link! I will have Jim-Bob and Billy-Joe place bottles of BigFoot Ale in key backwoods areas where BigFeets have been sighted.... I'll need around 1,500,000 to do the job. At last, we will catch one!"

Erk Holohead, a loyalish director of the YETI not SETI Institute, bravely consumed a six pack of Big-Foot Ale for 'research purposes' and will be available for comment once he emerges from his coma.