Texas Bigfoot Trashes Nature Walk

Bigfoot spotted at Brazos River - - Texas nature trail shuts down in panic!

A outlaw gang of Texas bird watchers, searching for the exceedingly rare spotted-triple-breasted-twit, ran smack into a wild Bigfoot during a recent bird hunting expedition along the Brazos River. Panic ensued. 
"We were already plenty scared, what with the nature trail sign telling us to be careful of feral coyotes, wild hogs, stinging wasps, poisonous snakes, and rancid real estate agents, when all of a sudden this furry apeman jumped right in front of us and got really, really angry. We thought that crazy bigfoot was going to attack us - - but it was mad at the nature trail sign, apparently because bigfoots weren't listed as being dangerous. I think his ego has hurt, poor smelly beast. That bigfoot busted that sign up real good and ran off into the trees."

And Bigfoots? What about Bigfoots?  Visitors complain the nature trial warning sign doesn't warn hikers of a savage Sasquatch danger.

Sheriff patrols, equipped with more coffee and donuts than usual, have been increased along the Brazos river in an attempt to calm the frightened public. Fort Bend County animal control officials released a "no comment" statement when questioned about the bigfoot sighting. "We're not talking", said one county official, "we're still getting flack for the way we handled that flying saucer traffic ticket incident last year.... we're not stupid!"