Monday, July 6, 2020

College Graduation Photo-Bombed by Bigfoot!

Family Kodak Moment turns to Mush as Marauding Sasquatch Photo-Bombs San Diego!

In what can only be called a conspiracy, a well-planned graduation photo carefully prepared by the Blinng family was utterly ruined when a blustering Bigfoot barged into the frame, destroying in a split-second over 60 minutes of meticulously arranged posing, tassels, hair, and teeth.
Cryptozoology?! Is that a Major?!
It is reported that Dr. Blinng, Director of the YETI not SETI Institute, missed the entire Bigfoot sighting yet again, having turned his back for a split-second to take his daily snuff. Subsequently frantic searches for any stray Sasquatch DNA came up negative.

As for the recent graduate, she has returned her BS Degree in Marine Biology to the University. "This is bogus!", she exclaimed. "After all these years of studying smelly fishy fishes and mucus loving Mollusca Aplacophora, I realize now where my true career lies - Cryptozoology!", she said excitedly. "Yes, that is where the real action is! No more research into Thiomargarita Namibiensis, oh no! It's Mermaids, The Loch Ness Monster, and Aquatic Space Alien Civilizations for me! Oh yes, and Gigantopithicus Revoltus - Bigfoot!", she said proudly, "I'll tell daddy he has to pay for 4 more years of college. He'll be very happy to learn of my new plans!"

At that point, Dr. Blinng complained of a sharp pain in his chest, swooned, and passed-out clutching his wallet. Recent reports indicate he is recovering nicely at the Institute's Yuba City facility, under observation.