Holy Sasquatch Fungus! Cow Pasture Exploration, Magic Mushrooms, Bigfoot Sighting!

Bigfoot Research Team Bungles State Park Bigfoot Sighting! Mushrooms Prime Culprit!

A long-planned Sasquatch Field Expedition by the YETI NOT SETI Institute, deep into the wilds of China Camp California State Park, ended in utter fiasco. Before it was all over, Director-for-Life Karl Blinng lay comatose and drooling in cow patties from an overdose of locally grown mushrooms. Professional Sasquatch victim and bored member Divot Looney suffered severe simian hallucinations and freaked-out furry paranoia from Bigfoots flying around his head like dragonflies. Both 'scientific gentlemen' are still in an undisclosed rehab recovery center somewhere on South of Mission Street. 

Advice: Magic Mushrooms and Sasquatch make for a bad trip. 

Divot Freaks Out from Bigfoot Magic Mushroom Attack! With Blinng unconscious, who took that photo? Another unsolved Crypto-Mystery! 

Magic Fungus:

Divot was able to relate his harrowing experience, as Blinng has not yet recovered the ability to speak. "We were going to test our research-grade tinfoil caps, to see if residual brainwaves would occur when we wear them. Little did I know that Blinng had been distracted by bizarre mushrooms found in a small wooded area. He'd eaten mouthfuls of the stuff. Naturally I had to nibble a bit myself. The next thing I know, Blinng had passed out AND a horrible stench surrounded me... I'd taken a shower that morning so I knew it wasn't me. I looked around and there was a BIGFOOT about to ATTACK ME. Again, dang it! Weird thing was it had wings and glowed purple and spoke in Eastern Esperanto. Then more of the hovering beasts showed up. Then more! Bummer trip, man! I realized the mushrooms had something to do with this wild overdose... but of course it was too late. I managed to call 911 and ask for help. I also called a friend of mine and told him to harvest the rest of those 'shrooms and bring 'em to my place for processing." 

 

Botanists are attempting to identify the species of Mushrooms eaten and harvested. "My guess is these fungus are of Martian origin. When I was abducted last time by aliens, between internal probe experiments they let me eat some!", opined an expert in extra-terrestrial fungus.

Erk Holohead, a member of the YETI-NOT-SETI Bored of directors, was confused. "I'm often confused, but this latest expedition fiasco beats them all for confusion! Who on that grassy knoll took that photo of Divot being terrified by buzzing Bigfoots? Blinng was out for the count. So who took that photo, eh? I think there is a third person involved! Not that I'm paranoid, but this looks like a conspiracy and both Mars and the CIA have a lot to answer for, again!"