- - gets seriously whacked for his efforts.
Tibet is in an uproar at dramatic news confirming the existence of a Yeti who throws deadly snowballs at humans. Local villagers found a flattened Yeti hunter buried under feet of snow, apparently knocked senseless by the Yeti-man.
|Seconds before the wild Yeti attacked.|
Recovering in hospital, Dim Wit said "The Yeti attack happened so fast. The Yeti beast ran out of the forest, looked at my camera, growled and heaved a gigantic snowball right on top of me... it hit like an asteroid. I must have been knocked out for hours. He stole my freeze-dried water supply too!"
Dr. Blinng, Director of the YETI not SETI Institute in Yuba City California, was jealously congratulatory. "(Yawn) My semi-sincere congratulations to Mr. Chann on his sort-of-incredible discovery. Of course, I knew Yetis roam the Himalayas.... duh?!? I am the world's expert on these things after all, just ask me. I am convinced Yeti are here in North America as well, such is my scientific greatness. Yeti are close relatives of Sasquatch - - both species have touchy personalities and stink to high heaven. They are like in-laws, these abominable snowman types, you know? Heck, my mother in-law looks like a Yeti!"
Chinese officials are silent on this politically sensitive issue. "Of course, the government wants to keep things quiet." said a local Yak Yogurt franchise owner, "Think about it; Yeti, Snow, Attack, Snowball... not only are these great search terms for search engines, but they are political dynamite if put into the wrong hands!"