Taunting BigFoot Flabbergasts Sasquatch Seminar Attendees, Makes Rude Gestures, Smells Bad!
In an amazing coincidence, some distinguished visitors to the annual North American Sasquatch Seminar, sponsored by the Institute of YETI not SETI, witnessed an actual BigFoot Sighting in Orinda, California.
Dr. Sheissterr gapes in disbelief at the sight of Sasquatch in Orinda. Dr. Bling is oblivious.
One of the eyewitnesses, Ricard Sheissterr, Ph.D. in UFO Pyramidology, was shocked. "There I was arguing, er discussing, with Dr. Karl Bling about which nasty personal hygiene habits of Anthropoids like Bigfoot and Yeti are the most disgusting, when all of a sudden one of the hairy beasts jogged right in front of my eyes! I could have sworn he made a 'Nany Nany Boo-Boo' gesture behind Dr. Bling's back! I went to the Seminar only because it had an all-you-can-eat Chinese Buffet to be honest, but this Gigantopithecus incident is icing on the Kung Pao!"
Dr. Bling, unknowingly taunted behind his back by the creature, expressed disapointment. "All my illustrious career at the Institute, I have worked hard to try and get even a small glimpse of this rare, elusive and obnoxious animal... but nooooooo! Then, here a Sasquatch comes up behind me and behaves quite badly! Now it's getting personal. I will pay $3,000 for the HIDE of this BigFoot!"
The Mayor of Orinda, California released a short statement on the Sasquatch sighting, "Huh?".
Rumors of other sightings in the San Francisco Bay Area have been reported. This BigFoot Blog will Bravely investigate these reports, but first a visit to a local winery... we're thirsty!
3 comments:
If my hayfever weren't acting up I would have smelled the wretched beast. Too bad Sheisster is such a blithering idiot all he could do was point and stare. What do you expect from a man who believes in a link between Roswell, UFOs, Sasquatch and Belgians. I'm sending Elmer and Joe Bob to the Bay Area to bring creature back to the Institute.
Will that festering pile of parrot droppings known as "Doctor" Bling ever get it right? I never made the connections he says I made, as I happen to know from two or three minutes of painstaking research that (a) no Belgians have ever been in or near Roswell and (b) no Sasquatch could ever stand the smell of a Belgian.
And the look on my face is not due to the beast being a Sasquatch - that would have brought out the scientist in me and my submachine gun. No, the sun was in my eyes (a carefully crafted bit of mini-torture from that evil Bling person) and all I could tell was that it was hairy as hell and funny-looking and concluded it was Robin Williams; hence my look of shock and dismay. A mistake anyone could have made.
And by the way, Bling, when discussing Belgians, it is spelled "Flems," not "Phlegms."
I should have Elmer and Joe Bob bring me the hide of Scheisster instead. He wouldn't know Robin Williams from Johnny Damon.
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