Santa Fe Sasquatch Sighting! Rare New Mexico Bigfoot Spotted!
Santa Fe locals, tourists, and peddlers of authentic fine southwest Hopeeee made-in-china art stuff were left in shock and amazement when a rarely seen New Mexico Sasquatch made a pathetic
paseo and promenaded through the central plaza during
yet another art & food festival. The sighting caused minor panic in the laid-back locals, who've seen just about everything. Tourists, however, once they realized the beast was not performing some demented form of street art, were highly bothered by obnoxious odors and noises emitting from the feral beast. The touristy mobs quickly evacuated the area to a questionable part of town known for double-margaritas and loud
salsa music.
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Santa Fe Sasquatch Caught on Camera! Local shops closed immediately after the sighting. |
"Yeah, I was there", said a local starving
artista. "Bad business! I was all set to sell-off my remaining inventory of one-of-a-kind pottery knick-knacks mass-produced in a factory in Shinzhen,
er, make that Shangra-la. Then this ugly furry animal walks by and chases away all the marks,
ah, my loyal customers! That Bigfoot wasn't noticed at first because it was kinda mellow and just sauntered by. But that cloud of fleas trailing it sure got the attention of everyone. The plaza was empty in minutes!"
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New Mexico Sasquatch roving Santa Fe's central plaza before heading towards Atalaya Mountain. |
"New Mexico Bigfoots are extremely rare, the desert is not their favorite place to hang out. We're
quite unlucky to see one.", said Erk Holohed, a member of the
YETI NOT SETI Institute board of directors.
Holohed was in Santa Fe for a scientifically useless but important all-you-can-drink crypto-zoology conference focused on '
South-by-SouthWest Sasquatches and Georgia O'Keefe- Real or Surreal?'. "This particular Santa Fe Sasquatch must have been attracted to quirky artiste vibes in the plaza and swirling smells of fried food. The combination must have driven the poor beast mad. We know
Bigfeet have problems understanding modern art. This poor brute may have had a serious mental issue with Southwestern art. He'll recover in the mountains. If we're lucky, he'll head towards
Colorado. A Sasquatch can become a friendly, furry, pot-head to the locals and fit right in."
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